she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Randomize
