We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize