If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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