Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
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