uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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