barbara walters just said penis...
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize