How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
