So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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