like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
