I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
