Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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