Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
