You're a womanizer and a bitch.
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
