And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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