I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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