Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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