so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
