I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
COCAINE IS GR8
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
