Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
