YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize