grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
