David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
