There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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