They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
