THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
