I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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