You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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