That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
We had to coat check the pizza.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
