If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
