I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
you will always have a special place in my vag
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
