Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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