And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
