Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
honey bunches of taint.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize