end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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