I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
My balls are so social today.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
