Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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