pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
