I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Randomize
