Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
