That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Randomize
