i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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