They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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