Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
