I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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