Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
