HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
