she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
