A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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