I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
