Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
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