I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
