That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize